What's your favorite disguise? [/meta]
posted by letter shredder @ 11:59 a.m. on 1/20/2006
"Great art is about conflict and pain and guilt and longing and love disguised as sex and sex disguised as love..."
-- Lester Bangs, Almost Famous
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
A Year It Has Been
It was an ordinary Monday. The message alert tone of my cellphone under my pillow woke me up. Half-asleep, I grabbed it. And with one eye open, I read the message.
Enough to make me utter, "S***!"
After some follow-up inquiries, I didn't waste any time and took a bath. Inside the shower, my mind was wondering how the others were and contemplated on how fast things have happened.
When I reached the university, some of my friends have already left while some were still planning on how to go to Bulacan.
In the afternoon, my friends and I met, most of them with puffy lids. We spoke like everything was fine but no one dared to laugh. While we divert our conversation to everything, our minds were anticipating for reality and what would be next.
And when we reached her house, every word became unutterable and turned into sobs. As embraces were exchanged, it was the first time that I recognized that she was really gone.
I stared at her beneath the glass and I saw no trace of pain. Like she was just peacefully asleep. On top of the glass was her picture, her graduation picture. A semester was just left to spare and she's bound to finish college. If not for the chemotherapy, she'd be marching with us the next month.
I restrained my tears and looked at everyone. Beside me were our friends and I could only offer a shoulder for the tears. I said I must not cry. But when her father sat with us and told us how his daughter have always asked him to bring her to school just to see us, I lost.
All memories of her came to me. She was one of the Powerpuff Girls in the block because she and her friends were inseparable.
Even after the chemo, she attended school again. She even joined the trip to Puerto Galera. My last conversation with her was about a guy from the College of Music whom she introduced to most of us already. I was just too happy to see her that afternoon believing that everything was perfectly fine.
Within the same semester, we noticed her absence. No one knew what happened and there were no messages from her. Later, we found out that she was sick again and planned to surprise her.
It turns out that we were the ones surprised.
It has been a year since she left and I can still feel the numbing sadness. But that's how it is...
His children are bound to be beside Him.