What's your favorite disguise? [/meta]

posted by letter shredder @ 11:59 a.m. on 1/20/2006

"Great art is about conflict and pain and guilt and longing and love disguised as sex and sex disguised as love..."
                                          -- Lester Bangs, Almost Famous



Friday, May 29, 2009

Hello, Stranger!

posted by letter shredder at 1:53 PM

(One extremely boring night)


Sanjog: watch this
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi i'm male 16 and U?
You: i m pretty yung 2
You: that was quick
Stranger: ?
Stranger: you have msn baby?
You: m a baby that shaves



Jaycee: huh?


Sanjog: i used this http://omegle.com/
that YOU is me
try it
u chat to a random unknown stranger



Jaycee: and then?


Sanjog: chat
that's all



(After a minute)


Jaycee: this is hilarious
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: ㅎ2?
You: ?
You: hi
Stranger: 안녕이라고
Stranger: 한국인아
Stranger: ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ
Stranger: 뭐야너



Jaycee: hahahaha


Sanjog: ha ha ha ha ha


Jaycee: Where did u learn about this?

Sanjog: Sharky
fish man


Sanjog: Stranger: hi asl
You: god 10000 SEX always 3 times a week
Stranger: so are you a girl
You: let me tell you what is Ivtech
Stranger: god it is impossible to find an actual girl on this website who wants to have a sexually explict chat
You: two camshafts controlled by a chip; changing the timing according to the rpm of the car



Jaycee: hahahaha
I'm now talking to Michael Jordan
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: hey its michael jordan
You: which michael jordan?
You: 11 0r 12?
Stranger: the one who played basketball
You: i know him
You: but with his vast collection, im geting confused
Stranger: i played for the bulls remember me
You: i cheered for our "new">barangay
Stranger: wut
You: just kidding
You: so u ran out of endorsements
You: ?
Stranger: no i am endorsed with hanes
You: ahhhh
You: and how has the recession affected u?
Stranger: and i have a clothing company
Stranger: o i have been doin fine playin some b-ball
Stranger: ive been ok
You: i heard abt ur latest customized jersey
Stranger: wut
You: u dont know abt ur latest customized jersey for the bulls?>
Stranger: no
Stranger: i dont
You: then u should check yahoo news abt urself



Sanjog: hahahaha
i am talking to someone from korea
i made a friend
he wants to learn english
he keeps saying nono
he writes without space bar
he says byebye
i have to say nono



Jaycee: hahahaha
I have to meet Obama here


(After a couple of minutes more)


Sanjog: I got Obama


Jaycee: really?


Sanjog: yeah
You: i am looking for president obama
Stranger: that's me
You: great
You: so howz life
Stranger: its ur lucky day
Stranger: lifes hectic
You: certainly iz
Stranger: but good
You: great
You: howz the pooch doing
Stranger: the american ppl have realized that it takes a long time for theses crises to end
You: i hope he doesnt mess up the white house carpet
Stranger: the pooch is doin great, tahnks
You: u opened up the Swiss bank account yet
Stranger: hah, even if he does, this is the white house, son,we get new rugs super faast
You: ofcourse
Stranger: and why would i tell youthat
You: HA HA HA HA
Stranger: you have red too many novels, son
Stranger: *read
You: nah
You: just a GAS
You: oh oh
You: i know the american style
You: probabaly we can shoot the pooch with bazooka




(Sometime more later)


Sanjog: i am exchanging Tai-chi lessons for english


Jaycee: hahahaha
nono


(And later than later)


Sanjog: "shi shi ni" is "thank you" in chinese, right?


Jaycee: yep
she she, i think
"nihao ma" is like "how are u"


Sanjog: i know; i was just wondering how to write it


(8 minutes: the log said so)


Jaycee: hey, nono


Sanjog: yesyes


Jaycee: he's now asking me to describe myself
:p
should i suggest a mail-order-bridesite?


Sanjog: say i am 77DD


Jaycee: shut up
it should be 85F


Sanjog: HA HA HA HA HA HA
man those are awsome
HA HA HA HA
he will have a heart attack


(Zzzz Zzzz Zzzzz)


Sanjog:
i am translating mozart in chinese



Jaycee: just say do-re-mi-no-no


(Trying my luck the next morning)


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hello
You: are u obama?
Stranger: no
You: *broken hearted
Stranger: im luke though
You: skywalker?
You: :-o
You: *force be with u
Stranger: sure:)

7 revealed their disguise



Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Looking on the brighter side of life

posted by letter shredder at 3:40 PM

While talking about the new moderators in the Calvin and Hobbes (CnH) community

A$im: hey ,..there r new mods there

me: mods? do i know the mods?

A$im: yaaa all of thm
there's no me in the list damn...

me: so who are they?
i only know meeta
if it's asa
then forget abt it
we are bound to be in the opposite poles

A$im: i was number 1 contender
confused n juggie r new mods

me: at least both are friends
but even shamaz doesnt hang out that much, i think

A$im: :P
yaaa...he is in india these days
job hunting
even juggie is not not much active these days

me: i see him late at nyt
like before it turns 12 in india
and by that time, i am zombied out
so i dont get to talk to him much

A$im: oh......
i was the most recommended one....why didnt she make me one

me: who was supposed to choose anyway
see, asim, u dont need to be a mod

A$im: owner

me: just befriend the mods and then act like a secret agent

A$im: lol :P

me: so even if u ask them to ban someone, u dont get urself in trouble
:p

A$im: hahahaha :P

me: nice, ryt?

A$im: u got a point

me: and in cnh, it's not like girls run after mods
girls are actually afraid of them
:p

A$im: lol :P :P
hahahaha :P

me: juggie didnt consider this before being chosen as mod
:p
i bet shamaz too

A$im: meeta recommended me n confu

me: the owner is debra, ryt?

A$im: yep

me: i sooooo dont know her
does she know u?

A$im: nope...

me: then that answers it
:p

A$im: :P
i'll ask meeta

me: it's ok if u are not a mod
i'll vote u mr. cnh international
:D

A$im: lol :P
i guess i can live without being a mod

me: if u have such title, girls go after u
and many girls will feel inferior compared to suna

A$im: i dont wnt nymore grls going after me...

me: coz mr. cnh international chose her
this is all just a show :p

A$im: lol :P :P

me: and u cant stop girls who will run after ur fame
and body
they dont love u
they just want ur body
:p

A$im: but its mine .... :P

me: they just wanna use u
:p

A$im: where these grls hiding??? i've been looking for thm whole my life :P

me: dont worry
even darthy is STILL looking for them
:p

A$im: lol :P

5 revealed their disguise



Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Tagged by The Sorcerer

posted by letter shredder at 8:06 AM

1. What am I wearing?
black slacks, maroon top


2.???
What the hell is the question, Sorcy?


3.What have I just eaten?

Have not eaten breakfast yet =(


4.What am I thinking right now?
What to eat for breakfast


5. My fave music at the moment:

Rihanna's Hate that I love You


6.Last movie:
Theatre: Watchmen
DVD: The Pianist


7. The most satisfying thing I did this week?

Movie marathon, then played bowling and billiards with friends


8. The most romantic thing I did this week:

Errr... what is romance? Does feeding a friend with a cashew nut count?
(FYI: Object of affection is missing.)


9.The worst thing I did this week:
(To be updated)



10.My favorite drink:
Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf's The Ultimate Vanilla/Mocha


11.My favorite time of the day:

Midnight, when I get to hit the sack


12.What's the quesion again, Sorcy?



13.Why did I ever take this tagging seriously?



(Questions 14-20 shall be extracted from the Sorcerer's pebble brain.)


21.How am I feeling right now?
Hungry. And irritated.


23.My first love was...
...a jerk.


24.Languages I speak:
Filipino, English (US), a dash of Spanish


25.Again, what is the question?

1 revealed their disguise



Monday, February 02, 2009

Friaaaanship

posted by letter shredder at 1:36 PM

Well, I hate spammers in my Orkut scrapbook. "Spammers" meaning people beyond my friends list who send me links of several other communities I've never heard of or special offers redirecting to other websites.


And today, due to boredom, I checked the link a certain Nazeem sent me. I found the idea really irritating. But when I saw the description, I ended up laughing really hard.













Well, I admit, to me, members of this community seem pathetic and desperate. But if they are able to support each other thru the forums (which caused me a serious case of epistaxi), then I'll let them be.


I just hope they don't bother me again. Ever.

6 revealed their disguise



Thursday, January 15, 2009

The wonders of Google search

posted by letter shredder at 4:00 PM

samurai jack



at the Calvin and Hobbes community, 10 scrap thread, January 14, 2009



Jaycee (J):
@ Maleficent: from which Disney movie is that witch in ur dp?
snow white or sleeping beauty? or is she a star in both?
@ Ravi: u still aren't wearing a shirt? [:0]


Lazy Crazy (Ravi, LC):
i was about to say that Maleficient's DP looks like its from Samurai Jack
any1 seen that in Cartoon Network?
@JC
heheh
yeahh i took this pic just aftah my shower, so no shirt on![/)]
but dont worry, i'll go shirt shopping a few days later [:p]


Maleficent (M):
@jaycee
.
.
.
sleepin beauty is the main one...rest all guest appearences...


LC:
Male De Ficient? [/)][;)]


A$im (A):
i know samurai jack!!!
...awesome series......my notebooks r full of his sketches....


J:
@ maleficent: then it's an honor to interact with the star witch of Disney![:D]
@ ravi: i know u'd shop, but are u gonna wear them [:o]
and yeah, my college crush looked like samurai jack [:p]


LC:
college crush looked like samurai jack
HAHAHAHAHA
very funny JC [:p]
can we meet him?
i and ASim are big fans! [:D]
i still donno the ending of the series tho!
Does he defeat the Evil AKUUUU???


A:
the series nvr reached tht far....


LC:
The witch has run away!
muahahahahahahaha


M:
the witch neva runs away!


LC:
ooh
CN sucks. it always stops shows midway! [:x]
and now all the shows are in telugu, hindi and whatnot!
(whatnot is a language, yes [/)])


J:
here is my samurai jack crush:
http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t73/ultimatepinoyhunks4/rtalosig01.jpg


M:
i hav placed the curse on one who posts next...


LC:
ohyeah
the witch FLEW away. on her broomstick [:p]


A:
looks like a character from x-men...


LC:
@JC
wow, hedoes look good
a sword is all thats missing !!


J:
i dont know what happened to my samurai jack:
http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t73/ultimatepinoyhunks4/rtalosig09.jpg
he was geeky back in college.


A:
thts wht u do sitting in office the whole day huh Jc??


LC:
HEYY JC
HE IS NOT WEARING A SHIRT!!
BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! [:p][/)]
BUT HE GOT ABS :(


J:
ravi- forget abt the sword.
check this: http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t73/ultimatepinoyhunks4/rtalosig16.jpg


A:
ooohhhh...he got a yellow cape.....cool!!!


LC:
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
http://i157.photobucket.com/albums/t73/ultimatepinoyhunks4/rtalosig16.jpg
what is THAT?!!!
is it supposed to be a superhero costume??
its LOL max [:D]
but yeah, he got awesome body
i'll try to get that in the next few months [:p]


J:
hahaha! ravi, i was just really trying his name in google and i got these pics.
he's now in a boy band


A:
Jc dear...u need to hoop up wid someone asap... :P


LC:
JC
a boy band?
what is that?
band of boys? doenst even sound cool
band of bad boys sounds cool


J:
i'm laughing hard here.
he didnt speak much in college, then i see him posing like this online.
whatever happened to him?
i gotta find another samurai jack to replace him in my wall of fame


A:
u know ....i got a 6 pack too Jc....


J:
a$im- then u just have to grow ur long hair back and buy a kimono [:D]
send me ur photos for my wall [;)]
i gtg.


LC:
@JC
well well, looks like ur frnd and i have something in common [;)]
i never spoke much in class either.
if my classmates see my orkut pics, they might very well wonder whothe *** i've become [/)][:D]


=====

* Samurai Jack photo from www.gamefaqs.com,

2 revealed their disguise



Thursday, November 13, 2008

(Desperate) Marketing ideas

posted by letter shredder at 2:17 PM

I almost fell from my chair when I saw this in my office e-mail...




.............


...........


.........


.......


.....


...


..


.



absolut hunk


So, you wanna get drunk? ;p

0 revealed their disguise



Thursday, November 06, 2008

My office fwendz...

posted by letter shredder at 2:42 PM


have you met them

Presenting

.........

.......

.....

...

.



the strawberry shortcake gang

the Strawberry Shortcake gang!


cuties

They're soooo cute even the Citi Service
cleaners say "hi" to them ;p


healthy kids

They are soooo strong they survive the biweekly fumigation :D



And now, a new guy has joined them.
Fresh from a car show in Australia,
meet our new mate (read: mayt)...
[insert drum roll here]



hi, mate!

Ronnie the Kangaroo!



the pouch among the roses

Together, they will guard my office station.








And of course, we can't miss...


squiddy

Squiddy of Boracay...


say, squid!

Hurrah! Hurrah!





*No child nor animal was harmed in making this post.
Photo shoot was done beyond office hours.

1 revealed their disguise



Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Performance Appraisal

posted by letter shredder at 8:16 AM

E-mail from Lavin.


=====


For everyone who has ever had an evaluation or performance review, just remember, it could have been worse. These are actual quotes taken from United States Federal Government employee performance evaluations:


1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and has started to dig."


2. "I would not allow this employee to breed."


3. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of definite won't be."


4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."


5. "When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet."


6. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead."


7. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy."


8. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."


9. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of its idiot."


10. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better."


11. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together."


12. "A gross ignoramus--144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."


13. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."


14. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime."


15. "He's been working with glue too much."


16. "He would argue with a signpost."


17. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."


18. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."


19. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one."


20. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on."


21. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection."


22. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."


23. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming."


24. "He's got two brain cells, one is lost and the other is out looking for it."


25. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."


26. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."


27. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."


28. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm."


29. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled."


30. "Takes him 2 hours to watch '60-minutes'."

1 revealed their disguise



Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Early halloween treats

posted by letter shredder at 2:34 PM

kindly press key for panic attacks


Saturday


My friends and I attended an award function at the Philippine World Trade Center and had dinner afterwards, which I hosted. We had fun even during dinner at Marina because the committee prepared some fun awards for the group... and I got the "Best Friend" award for being a friend to everyone (though I was seriously praying for the "Couple of the Night" award ;p). When Jerrold told me how the awarding would go, he said nomination will still happen for the "Best Friend" award, then he just announced it himself that I won it.


Well, the night is young so we proceeded to party at Pier One. Unfortunately, the long tables were taken and we were too many so we have to be divided into groups.


A band played a few famous songs including Alanis' You Oughta Know. When they left, the stage was open for dancing, which me and my friends were actually waiting for.
We danced as a group. I can say I'm too reserved for bar dancing but I enjoy being with friends on the dance floor.


So when a drunk guy came to me for a dance, I just politely smiled at him and said I'm not good at dancing. Well, he just proceeded by holding both my hands and still dancing. I said "thank you" quite a number of times to politely shoo him off, but the damn guy just said "It's time to have fun."


Well, I was havin' fun before you entered the scene, I so wanted to tell him. But if I create any commotion there, I know my guy friends would all come to him and the bar would be a pandemonium. So while this guy and I were going in circles, literally, I was checking where my friends are.


And yeah, the bouncer is standing right next to me!!! Yey!


So before Mr. Calvin Klein (that's the shirt he was wearing) made more attempts to grind himself on me, I gave him a final "thank you" and pulled my hands from his grasp. And I turned to my friends.


Almost running.


Tuesday


My friend Anil asked me Monday if I can bring carabao milk from my province, so I asked my Dad to drop by the office to bring some. He came and brought seven 1.5-liter bottles filled with carabao milk, which I had to endure bringing to the 15th floor.


Anil, however, said he cannot pick them up himself so he is sending his friend Rao. I waited for sometime but he came to the other entrance of the building I work at, so we met halfway and gave him the three bottles. We didn't talk too much because Rao was tired and I was damn hungry. It was almost 4PM and I have not eaten lunch yet.


A few minutes later, I received an SMS from my business mentor.


WHO IS THE INDIAN GUY?


Oh, shit!


I know I'm already 24 but I felt embarrassed by how my mentor asked me. She obviously saw me. What I am afraid of is that she's gonna tease me, actually, in our trainings.


And lo and behold, when we met in the evening, I cannot deny anything because she had my picture in her phone, me talking to Rao. And it looked like we were meeting at a backside alley.


Now, I understand why Hollywood stars hate the Paparazzi. ;p

0 revealed their disguise



Friday, October 03, 2008

Please vote for my cousin's Converse entry

posted by letter shredder at 12:07 AM

Hi, everyone!


My cousin Emmaluz submitted an entry in a scholarship contest sponsored by Converse. I'd like to request your assistance by voting for her entry and if it won't take much of your time, forward this message to your friends and/or post it on your blogs.






Thank you very much for your time.


Spread the love! Cheers!

1 revealed their disguise