What's your favorite disguise? [/meta]
posted by letter shredder @ 11:59 a.m. on 1/20/2006
"Great art is about conflict and pain and guilt and longing and love disguised as sex and sex disguised as love..."
-- Lester Bangs, Almost Famous
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Snooze Your Way Out
In college, my friends and I excuse ourselves in I-had-enough-of-that and I-won't-buy-that-crap conversations by pretending to be narcoleptic. Yeah, we doze off (face flat) on coffee tables and snore.
August last year, I attended a forum and met Xeng, one of the top make-up artists in the country. She told us that she dozes off once in a while for about 30 minutes because she is sick. Traffic enforcers know her because she has to pull over and take a nap when she's driving. However, she added, that there are only two activities where she doesn't fall asleep -- when she's applying make-up and when she's engaged in sex. The latter would definitely be difficult to escape from.
My post today isn't actually about the psychology behind narcolepsy nor the stand of Filipinos on the said problem. Otherwise, I could have joined Ms. Philippines (given that I have good moral character *wink wink*).
I found these witty and creative excuses (most helpful to me) when caught sleeping in the office and want to share them with you (for posterity use). Thanks to Mandz. Emphasis, mine.
1. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
2. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap as described in that time management course you sent me."
3. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out You probably got here just in time!"
4. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."
5. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."
6. "I was doing Yoga exercises to relieve work-related stress."
7. "Damn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."
8. "The coffee machine is broken..."
9. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."
10. " ... in Jesus' name. Amen."