What's your favorite disguise? [/meta]
posted by letter shredder @ 11:59 a.m. on 1/20/2006
"Great art is about conflict and pain and guilt and longing and love disguised as sex and sex disguised as love..."
-- Lester Bangs, Almost Famous
Monday, July 05, 2004
In Celebration of Gay Pride Month
My Lola celebrated her 88th birthday last Saturday (and Lola wasn’t a showgirl). Guests were just close family friends and relatives. Having guests like the daughter of Mayor Munding del Rosario and Mayor Jonjon Ferrer was not really surprising. Bong Revilla and Epi Velasco went to Lolo’s birthday before.
I saw most of my cousins and I’d say we have not had good conversations for a long time until then.
Well, I was assigned to take video footages. And it was not really very fulfilling…
I only invited one guest—Neneng. The celebration started by lunchtime but she came just in time for dinner. She came to celebrate with us, and I asked her because we really need to talk. As in!
I hinted that she was really suspicious about one thing, and she surprised me. She told my cousins that I had a boyfriend—HIM! I did not want to discuss it in front of my cousins so I just shut my mouth until we were alone.
We went to the buffet table. My cousin Vic had her boyfriend with her—Kenneth. He was a schoolmate in high school, just two years ahead of us. Neneng decided that we share the table with the two since all were occupied. Before I was able to pull a chair, my aunt called me to take the video to where my cousins were singing. When I finally got to sit and eat, Neneng told me that Kenneth has informed her that he saw HER in Vito Cruz. Right there and then, she knew why we really needed to talk.
After eating, I brought her to the covered basketball court in front of the house. Armed with a basketball, we started our SERIOUS discussion. We realized that we just had more things in common. I did not have to tell her what I thought she needed to know, because what Kenneth said was enough. By then, we were both ranting on why they did not tell us what’s between them. Actually, we were really thinking that they did not really want to tell us. HE was my best friend (operative word: was); SHE is one of her closest friends. Neneng concluded that it’s already THEM. Worse is, we think we’re the only ones who do not know. When we get to ask the people close to us and close to THEM, it’s either they keep silent or they tell us that it’s THEM who should tell us.
I was considering that they were just really busy. But Neneng said, SMS does exist. And a single won’t hurt.
We have not planned what we should do to find out. I told her I won’t be surprised but it would really hurt if we find it out from other people.
I cannot easily talk about this damn problem to other people because most of whom I talk to tease/doubt me of having a problem because I love him not for a best friend. If they don’t do the teasing while I’m confiding, they would when it is totally unexpected. And I have to let everyone understand my idea of friendship.
After the “THEM” conversation, I asked her where did she get the idea that it was US. Well, all the while I was telling her that I am mad at HIM, she was also thinking that I am in love with HIM. *sigh*
But after what Kenneth said, she erased the idea immediately and had a hint of what my rants were all about.
I was able to tell Neneng why I was mad at HIM, but I also led her to get mad at HER. She’s supposed to give HER a surprise party because she’s soon celebrating her birthday.
So, I’ll get on with my plan—I WON’T TALK TO HIM UNTIL HE DOES.
Call it pride.