What's your favorite disguise? [/meta]

posted by letter shredder @ 11:59 a.m. on 1/20/2006

"Great art is about conflict and pain and guilt and longing and love disguised as sex and sex disguised as love..."
                                          -- Lester Bangs, Almost Famous



Tuesday, February 10, 2004

posted by letter shredder at 5:31 PM

Hindi ako magaling na artista...

mahigit isang linggo na...

umiiyak pa rin ako!

sa problemang 'di ko alam kung ano ang solusyon... sana ako na lang ang may problema, na ako na lang 'yung kailangang damayan...

any moment from now, my tears would again start to fall... tuluy-tuloy lang silang lahat... gusto ko mang pigilan, wala akong magawa...

funny it seems, how a few drops can control my whole being... can actually make me fully drop...

to the bottom line.

hindi ako masaya... i do laugh but that sheer emotion would only last for a few seconds. last while the laugh lasts... until someone could still hear me...

parang wala akong karapatang sumaya, dahil kapag naalala ko silang lahat, iniisip ko kung nagagawa pa ba nilang tumawa...

nag-aaral ako pero lumilipad ang utak ko. sabi ko kailangang tapusin ko ang mga dapat kong tapusin para hindi na makadagdag sa problema... pero hindi ko maisali 'yung lungkot sa mga tatapusin... sana...

ayoko nang umiyak, coz i would not want to fall, completely fall... i must not... dahil baka ako na lang 'yung natitirang malakas...

i'm tired...

physically...

mentally...

emotionally...

may mga gusto akong masagot, pero hindi ko alam kung kaya ko nang marinig 'yung sagot...

dahil lang sa kumplikadong "oo" o "hindi," pwede nang huminto ng mundo ko...

as i look at the pictures, the pictures that were taken before... when i cannot put into words how happy i was... i wanted to laugh, and i wanted to cry...

i'm happy coz, at least, i knew how it was to be happy...

and i wanted to cry, coz i do not know if i would be happy again...

i probably would. but not like before...

and i'm not certain when that would be again...

if there i would be an "again..."

pero sana...

sana...

0 revealed their disguise